I have a habit of tagging inquiries by saying, “It won’t hurt my feelings if you say, ‘No.'”

Yesterday, I asked my mom if she wanted to go to a plant shop in the burbs. I bookended my question by letting her know it was okay to say no. But why did I add this permission slip? Mom isn’t a pushover, agreeing to every ask by her firstborn.

I tell people that it is okay to say no because I require the reminder. As a people-pleaser, I struggle to say “No.” I don’t consistently set boundaries because I fear what others will think about me. If I decline a request, they will think I’m a jerk. (God forbid!)

“No” is not a four-letter word.